Julie Lythcott-Haims started her speech by explaining that she didn’t set out to become a parenting expert; however, it is clearly evident to her that certain parenting styles impede their children’s chances to develop.
She goes on to explaining that although at one end of the spectrum we are worrying about parents that do not give enough parenting to their children, but at the other end of the spectrum there are parents that give way to much parenting – and this Julie states can be detrimental.
Julie informs the audience that through over-parenting your children you are giving them what is defined as a check-listed childhood. She explains that this type of childhood is similar to that of training a dog; only showing approval if everything is done 100%; in this case,we, of course, are referring to the grades.
Julie goes on to inform the audience that although, it is true one can ensure their children will obtain the highest results through this parenting method; it also comes with high risks, often by high school this can lead to your child being worn out and even depressed; wondering if life is worth all this work.
Types of parenting Styles
Julie further discloses to the audience that when we over-parent our kids in sacrifice to good grades and awards; often our children are absolved from things such as chores; which the Harvard Grand Study proved to be one of the most critical elements in success.
Julie explains to the audience that the reason for this is doing chores gives you a roll your sleeves up, pitch in and do the work no one else is going to do mindset; Julie goes on to tell the audience that this is, of course, a key attribute to what you need to do in every job, do the work before it has even been asked for.
Julie Lythcott-Haims concludes that children should still be pushed towards grades; however this should not become the focus of happiness; rather you should remain open to them, ask how their days was and show interest – she states that the job of parents is not to make your children become what you want them to but rather to support them becoming themselves!